
I immediately shit myself, not that uncommon for a 90 year old tbh, and start weaving through bushes while reciting prayers from the Bible, Quran, even threw in some dank nasheeds for a second, I guess it worked because I didn't get hit once. I have no idea how I didn't hear or see them until I was nut to butt with what I can only imagine are two TTVs who have been grinding this game everyday since wipe for their 0 viewers. Like I was spooning one of them for a second, I got soaked from the sweat pouring off these guys. On my way, deadass run straight into two thicc boys. Booked it from spawn right towards the USEC camp aka gravity well, it seems every pmc spawning on that side of the map is instantly pulled into it. Took a break for a while, came back and did a run with just an m9 and a single backup magazine, stuffed 3000 rupes into my butt to pay for extract and did a night raid. Poor guy probably felt like he was executing their braindead grandpa or something. First off, dude I have a PACA and dick helmet, overkill much? And second, this dude sat there, staring at me, for 4 minutes, wondering how the fuck I manged to wander out of hospice and get a gaming PC setup to just to support Nikita's juice addiction.

After 4 minutes, the bush next to me one taps me with 995.

Don't see a single thing move, although I wouldn't be surprised if every pmc and player scav on the map walked into my view and I just didn't see them. I sat on that rock for 4 minutes just chilling. So I thinks to myself, I'll just post up on this here rock and observe for a while then move in. Nades and 60 round magazines are a flyin.

Take 2 more steps and hear WW3 starting near the USEC camp.right where I need to go. Anyway I barely take 2 steps and an even older geriatric man fell asleep on his keyboard, and waddles Infront of me.

Only a bunch of clowns would get ambushed like that. I just went on a raid on woods to try and pitter patter over to daddy Prapor's circus parade float ambush or something? Idk I didn't read the task message. I swear my eyes start seeing 144p or something once I make the tragic mistake of subjecting myself to the emotional assfucking that is Tarkov. Every time I boot this "cock and ball torture simulator disguised as a game" up I age 60-70 years.
